New president.

November 7th, 2008

After Obama was elected, I came to work the next morning and talked to my co-worker Z. He said, “Where I live in Brooklyn, there was partying in the streets. You know at the end of ‘Return of the Jedi’, when the empire is defeated and the Ewoks are singing the yup-yup song? That’s what it was like.” I think that is the best description of post-election rejoicing I’ve heard so far. If someone can find a description better than “Ewoks singing the yup-yup song”, I would like to hear it.

Addendum: B. informs me that it’s the “yub nub” song. And he sent me a link of a barbershop quartet singing it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IN62wqBdbxA

Belated Halloween post. Also, sick.

November 6th, 2008

I have a raunchy, nasty cold. It started in my lungs, and over three days it migrated up until it was in my face, exploding out of my sinuses like fireworks on Chinese New Year. Throw the Rockettes doing a line-kick in there too and you have an idea. I can’t breathe. My office-mate Nelly is going to kill me because when I drink water I can’t inhale, so I sound like a French bulldog. I don’t feel bad about it, though, because she is the one who gave this disease to me, so she has to listen to me snuffling and horking all day as penance. Ha ha *cough* ha.

We celebrated Halloween here at work, so I got all dressed up as my interpretation of a scarecrow, only to get out of the costume an hour later and not go to the party I had intended to go to because I felt so poorly. Maybe I’ll wear the same scarecrow costume again next year, no one will remember or care. Here are some pics.

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And later I had someone take a picture of the nest with eggs I had in my hair.

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I was trying to use my hands to frame the nest, but someone looked at this picture and inquired if I was doing the robot. I see that now.

Also, to get my hair curly, I slept in rollers and wore them to work all day and was mocked by one and all.

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Go ahead. Laugh at me. Everyone else has.

I wish I hadn’t been sick, I would have enjoyed frolicking in a downtown party. Also, if anyone is wondering why I make my own costumes, this video should clarify that.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4rUiV_Hh74

There’s some coarse language in it, so don’t watch it at work unless you have your headphones on.

Addendum:
I thought my homemade costume was lovely, but then I saw my co-worker S.’s costume and I was like, “Oh yeah, there’s a winner.” S. was The Cyclone, the Coney Island rollercoaster. Seriously. Check it out.

S. from the side:

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S. from the front:

shaun2.jpg

Wait, it gets better. The whole track is lined with little white Christmas lights, and the red sign is lined with little red Christmas lights, all attached to a battery pack hidden in the boxy midsection. Mind-blowing, I know. S. went down to The Today Show that morning to see if he could win best costume, but he was beaten by Spiderbaby. He was a good sport about it, c’mon, Spiderbaby is freakin’ adorable. And the costume is clever.

http://jezebel.com/5072166/spiderbaby-attacks-today-show-with-killer-cuteness

I drew a tortoise.

November 5th, 2008

I’m trying to beef up my drawing and painting portfolio, and after seeing Religulous I was reminded of a story my father once told me. He read that a scientist was giving a talk somewhere about where we all come from, Genesis versus Big Bang, etc. Afterwards, an old woman came up to him and said, “My people believe that the world is on the back of a turtle. And that turtle is on the back of another turtle. And this pillar of turtles go all the way down.”

The scientist said, “All the way down to… where?”

And the woman said, “Don’t be impertinent, young man.”

Anyway, that inspired me to draw a tortoise with a village on its back. Here’s the original sketch.

tortoise-drawing.jpg

I’m going to do some pen work on it and then I’m going to do some watercolor work on it and then I’m going to do some acrylic work on it. All very similar to the deep sea fish series. It should be a lovely tortoise when it’s done.

Best campaign commercial, maybe ever.

November 2nd, 2008

First of all, I would like to apologize to B. because he hates this whole meme. I am sorry.

Eight years ago, the “Wassup?” commercial came out. I thought it was very funny the first couple times I saw it. Then there were those damn animated aliens doing it, and it was in “Scary Movie” and all of America including me was sick of it. Sick, I tell you. I never wanted to hear “wassup” ever again. Here is the commercial, which I recommend you watch right now, because it will make the next part even more betterer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L38wthA4Ld0

Great. Now that that has brought back eight million irritating memories, check out what I saw last week. It brings such mirth to my life, I can’t even stand it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qq8Uc5BFogE&NR=1

I haven’t laughed that hard in a long, long time. Don’t forget to vote on Tuesday.

Websites that are fairly self-explanatory and fun to look at when you have nothing better to do.

October 30th, 2008

People who totally look like other people, or things:

http://totallylookslike.com/

Some of the finest school and glamour photos ever taken in one collection:

http://renz-o.blogspot.com/

And finally, hot chicks with “men named after a feminine cleansing product”:

http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/

Twigs! In my hea-uh! Eeee!

October 28th, 2008

(Title is a reference to Finding Nemo)

Oh, yeah, let’s build a Halloween costume, Jessica. Oh, that would be fun, wouldn’t it, being that you have a party to go to and a costume-judging contest at work. Good times. Except that I wanted to be a cute little scarecrow-type-person, so I went to the twig district (I love New York, they have a twig district) and bought a whole bunch and suplemented those with some from my mother’s garden and now my bedroom is filled with bits of bark and tiny little gnats and I ended up not using most of the twigs anyway, bleagh. Stupid costume. I better win that damn contest, that’s all I’m sayin’.

Rhinebeck Sheep and Wool Festival.

October 24th, 2008

Last weekend I went to the Rhinebeck Sheep and Wool Festival. I heard there would be bunnies and llamas and alpacas and punkin’ chunkin’, I just had to go. So my mom and I took the two-hour ride up to Rhinebeck, NY. The weather was gorgeous, the leaves were changing and it was just so durn pretty. And lookit – I took pictures.

Right in the entrance you were greeted by a pen with two lovely rams with spotted noses and pretty horns.

photogenic-ram.jpg

Then immediately after that, there were lemurs! I know! I was surprised too.

Ring-tailed lemurs, three of them hanging around a heat lamp:

ringtailed-lemurs.jpg

And a brown lemur who looked slightly deranged and sleep-deprived, but I think that’s just how they look:

brown-lemur.jpg

And a super-Qte kangaroo sunbathing.

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Mmm, tasty sun. Do you see the pouch-hole? It’s a lady roo.

Then there’s the food booths, all kinds of predictable and unpredictable fair options. I had just had brunch (I really freakin’ love a good Bloody Mary. It’s always a good day when you start with alcoholic gazpacho.) so I passed on pretty much everything offered, but they had deep-fried dough, baked potatoes with a myriad of toppings, ice cream, caramel apples (okay, I TOTALLY had one of those, SO worth it), sheep cheese sellers and this booth, which clearly sold a little of everything.

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Well-painted signage, too. My favorite are the two signs inside the booth, one for pickles and one for cappuccino. It reminded me of one of my first dates with Cricket, when we went to the Museum of Natural History (“the wacky evolution museum”). We had toured it and needed lunch so we went to the cafeteria and I learned an important thing about Cricket, which is that he liked to dunk food items into other food items regardless of what either of those items are. We get lunch and Cricket gets a slice of pizza, some garlic knots and some raspberry coffee. You can tell where this is going. Garlic knots right into the coffee. I was like, “O …kay, that’s an intriguing flavor combination.” Meanwhile a greasy garlic film is forming on his coffee and I’m considering dumping him right there, it was so gross. I didn’t and I’m glad I overlooked his strange dunking fetish. But when I saw the pickles and cappuccino signs right next to each other, I thought perhaps if Cricket was there, he would consider that an excellent dunking situation. Moving on.

Shortly after the food options was the fiddling competition. Really. I have pictures. Look, fiddling.

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Waiting for their turn to fiddle.

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More kids waiting for their turn to fiddle. I had no idea there were this many fiddle-playing aficionados in upstate New York.

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And then, sheep. A great multitude of sheep. Come meet some sheep. This one had cool horns.

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Different angle on horny (tee hee!) ram.

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These are sheep getting judged for whatever sheepish (snork!) qualities the judges look for. I also learned sheep hate being judged.

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They make a shrieking “BAAAAAHAA!” noise and try to kick, they are not all poised like show dogs. However, outside the ring, they can imitate lap dogs.

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Awww. That’s Sue. Sue the Sheep. She likes to sit on her owner’s lap and just hang out. Isn’t she sweet?

Every farm that was there got a pen, and you could hang a sign telling people who you were and what kinds of sheep you bred, wool you had, etc. Most signs were just big vinyl ones, but this one was different and charming.

sign1.jpg

And this one made me want to give the owners of the farm a big underpants wedgie.

enterprise-farm.jpg

Then we moved onto the llamas. Big, fluffy llamas. Here is a llama peering at me through clothing made with his fiber. He’s an inquisitive llama.

llama-peering.jpg

But some llamas are not as bright. This llama was staring off into the distance. See how his mouth is full of hay? He’s not chewing it. Just, you know, blankly staring. Holding hay in his mouth. I would like to think that he was thinking about something very important that required all of his brain power, but I’m guessing he was listening to the breeze gently flow through his empty head.

not-bright-llama.jpg

There were alpacas there too, but I forgot to take pictures of them. Just imagine a smaller llama with a cushion of fluffiness on their heads. That’s what an alpaca looks like. There were also some rabbits there, angora and lionhead rabbits, and they were just delightful. I was so busy petting them that I forgot to take pictures of them. I found some on the internet, though.

Lionhead rabbits:

lionhead-rabbit.jpg lionhead.jpg

Angora rabbits:

hope0912.jpg angora_rabbit.jpg

And did I mention there was some wool at this thing? Oh, there was wool.

wool1.jpg

Rooms and rooms of the stuff.

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WOOL. TONS OF WOOL.

wool3.jpg

By then, Mom and I were tired, so we headed out and on out way back to the car, we saw the kangaroo again. And the little joey was poking its little joey face out of the pouch! Everyone standing around melted like sno-cones in the sun. So precious.

kangaroo-joey.jpg

Also, I wanted to add that I saw a woman there with a baby boy, and the baby boy was sporting the most delightful hat.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=16012273

That’s the baby, and that’s the hat. Go buy it for everyone you know. The hat, I mean.

And this woman has a video blog about 2006’s festival (which looks identical to this year’s festival) I recommend you watch it.

http://letsknit2gether.com/2006/11/01/episode-005-nys-sheep-and-wool-festival/

Religilous and A Man For All Seasons.

October 21st, 2008

I saw Religilous this weekend. It was a rough movie to watch. I don’t like movies where simple regular people are made fun of without them knowing it. That’s why I didn’t like Borat. And this movie was just chock full of hurtful mockery of people’s beliefs. It’s sad to watch, regardless of how silly I believe their faith to be. The point of the movie was Bill Maher basically proving how idiotic and irrational religion is, which (surprise!) did not go over well with the devoted religious followers he was interviewing. Here’s the preview.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iUyAppOOU0

I won’t comment on whether I agreed with what he had to say because I try to stay away from inflammatory topics here, but I will say that opposed to the usual “religion is dumb because it’s all fairy tales” argument most atheists take, Bill most eloquently said something along the lines of:

“I am a preacher. I am preaching doubt. We don’t know what happens after we die or if there’s a God. And I’m okay with that. A great deal of people are not. However, now we have the luxury of doubt. When a man is in prison and he says, ‘Jesus is all I got,” that’s fine. When a man is in a foxhole, he needs God. But our society is well-fed and well-taken care of, we have scientific answers for things, the concerns of the black plague are no longer a major concern. Yet people, people who are rational and intelligent in every other aspect of their lives, choose to believe that a man lived in a big fish – I can’t understand that.”

It was nice to hear an smart argument for a change. Religilous is the kind of film that sticks with you for a long time. You go to sleep, you’re thinking about it. You wake up, you’re thinking about it. You see large masses of people (which I do all the time, I work in Herald Square next to Macy’s) and you wonder, “What does that person believe? And that person? And does the first person hate the second person for their religious orientation? And how much is your religion based on what religion you grew up with?” It’s a gristle-y film that you have to chew on for a while.

I saw Religilous on Friday night. On Saturday, I went with my mom to the city and saw the play A Man For All Seasons. Wow, that was a bad idea. Not the play, the play was excellent and Frank Langella was freakin’ awesome as usual. It’s just that when one is still reeling from Religilous, it is a poor idea to see a play about a man getting beheaded for his morals and devotion to the Catholic church. Technically, Sir Thomas More was beheaded for not signing the document that King Henry VIII’s divorce from Catherine so he could marry Anne Boleyn and sire sons (all this brought about the beginning of the Church of England). I wanted to scream at him, “Sign the damn document! Just sign it! Bless the stupid divorce already! God doesn’t care! He’s busy with other things, like creating a new kind of badger or something! Sign the document!” I probably would have enjoyed it a great deal more if I wasn’t all rankled up the night before. Oh, well. Honestly, if I had a top rated divorce lawyer like I wish I did right now, maybe this whole process would be a lot less stressful.

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Excellent pumpkin decorations.

October 21st, 2008

I just saw this and thought it was so beautiful I had to share it.

http://www.eddieross.com/eddie_ross/2008/10/pumpkins.html

Long story short: Man buys small pumpkins. Man cuts them out from the bottom. Man drills holes in pumpkins. Man puts tea lights in pumpkins. Man impresses the crap out of me.

pumpkins2.jpeg

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pumpkins1.jpeg

I love Glowing Pumpkin Stairwell. The only thing I would do differently is I would try to rig it with battery-powered fake little tea lights so I wouldn’t have to go around relighting tea lights all night. Those suckers burn out pretty fast. But other than that, simply stunning.

Spam, wonderful spam.

October 20th, 2008

I like to keep everyone updated on the type of spam I receive. Most of the time it’s sexually related and pretty blunt: “Things that go into other things! Different people, different places!! Click here!!!” Now I’m getting spam with one of these as the beginning:

Hello design-newyork.com , grim for my spam, I realy desperate straits moneys, I’am a inadequate student…

Hello design-newyork.com , stark for my spam, I realy emergency moneys, I’am a pitiable student…

Hello design-newyork.com , grim for my spam, I realy dire moneys, I’am a as a church-mouse student…

And then it goes into More Things Into Things!!!. I totally don’t get this new trend. In my mind I see this little Victorian boy dressed in rags in the street peddling smut to make a shilling. “Please sir, if I don’t sell this mature lesbian video, Mummy won’t be able to feed all us. One of us will go hungry again unless someone purchases this granny-on-granny lovefest.”