While I’m making candied walnuts to share with folk, please enjoy this collection of lovely and informative charts I have found in my internet travels.
Archive for the ‘Teh Intarwebz’ Category
Merry Christmas! Have some charts.
Tuesday, December 25th, 2012Movies I have seen recently.
Friday, December 21st, 20121. Thor. I saw it was streaming on Netflix along with Captain America and I know you should probably see them before The Avengers, so I saw them both. Captain America was okay, but Thor was right up my alley. It was kind of cheesy and kind of epic and there were Norse gods, who doesn’t like a good Norse god story? My only problem is that the ethereal beings in the movie live on Asgard, and at no point does anyone drink out of the skulls of their enemies. I know that Valhalla is part of the world of Asgard, so why no skulls/enemies/drinkies? This caused me sadness because my whole life I wondered how one did that. You know the human head is full of holes, right? Tons of sinusii and nostrils and then there’s the eyeballs, they have to connect to the brain somehow. I was hoping I would see how the gods pulled it off, filling up the skull with beer without it all flowing out the holes. Also, I just looked up Asgard, and Wikipedia says this:
In Norse religion, Asgard is one of the Nine Worlds and home to the Norse gods of the Æsir. It is surrounded by an incomplete wall attributed to a Hrimthurs riding the stallion Svaðilfari, according to Gylfaginning. Odin and his wife, Frigg, are the rulers of Asgard.
Anybody else think “Hrimthurs” looks like it’s written backwards, both when read backwards and forwards? Anyone else?
Okay, Thor was great, loved the big bad monster near the end, good Hollywood stuff.
2. Magic Mike. What… what the hell was that? It’s filmed by acclaimed director Steven Soderbergh. The shots he chose were really interesting and beautifully constructed, even though the movie was unnecessarily filmed in what I lovingly referred to as “Piss-O-Vision”. There’s a strong yellow tint to all the non-stripclub-related shots. It would make sense in an art house film or something, but I think this was supposed to be a mainstream film, so it looks out of place. I blame Instagram and those frikkin’ filters all the kids are talking about. And the plot was an extended episode of 90210. The stripper-guy with big dreams likes a girl and helps her brother, but she doesn’t like him because of what he does, whatever will happen I wonder? That being said, watch this movie for Matthew MacConaughey. I don’t think they gave him any direction for this film. I think they just told him to go do his thing, and do it bigger. No, bigger. In one shot, he’s working out with all the strippers and he’s wearing a cut-off t-shirt and black boyshorts. Unironically. I was like, “Did he raid the Flashdance costume closet? Am I supposed to infer he’s a maniac, maniac on the floor, and he’s dancing like he’s never danced before? Because that’s what I’m seeing.” He was fantastic. It’s a good film to rent if you don’t want to do any heady thinking. Watch it with friends so you can turn to them and exchange thoughts and feelings like, “That guy is really grinding up on that lady, ” or, “Why is both the ocean and the sky kinda yellow?” or “Saw that coming a mile away”.
3. I listened to an episode of the podcast The Nerdist where the guest was Guillermo del Toro, and he was delightful and funny. First of all, he’s from Guadalajara, Mexico, so he has a soft lovely Mexican accent. I heart accents so much. Second of all, he’s really fun to listen to because he’s incredibly smart and loves what he does. It’s a terrible-sounding episode due to technical errors, but I listened to it twice, I enjoyed del Toro’s part so much. I’ve seen Hellboy and Hellboy II and Pan’s Labyrinth, and I saw that Mimic was streaming on Netflix (the phrase “streaming on Netflix” is a big part of my life) so I watched it. Oy. Not… not great. The giant bugs were great, but other than that, not good. At one point I thought, “Well, at least we’re probably nearing the end now, so soon it will be finished,” and I scrolled over the scrubby bar at the bottom.
What?!!?! And hour left? Ehhhhhhhh.
Everyone’s really excited about his new film coming out, Pacific Rim. I think it looks really similar to Transformers, but since this is a totally different director AND Idris Elba is in it (great actor), I have high hopes for it. You can see the trailer here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vKz7WnU83E
This weekend I’m going to see The Hobbit Part I in Imax. I will post a review as soon as I’m done.
Addendum: I saw The Hobbit Part I. It was okay. Not great, not bad, okay. A couple of thoughts:
1. They used the word “whence” correctly and that made me happy. It’s not “from whence they came”, the “from” is already part of the word. It’s “whence they came”. So good job movie people.
2. One of the dwarves looks like Ryan Gosling in a fake nose. I was kinda of bummed when I looked it up and found out that it was not. Alas.
3. Oh look, it’s the guy from Flight of the Conchords, Brett. He’s an elf again (he was an elf in LOTR), but this time he has lines, several of them! Good for him.
4. Gollum is awesome. So great. So is Martin Freeman.
5. Whatever program filter they use when someone puts on the ring and the world becomes hairy, it’s the same filter they used in Harry Potter when a dementor tries to steal your breath. Not a bad thing, just a thing I noticed.
6. In the last scene where they show piles of money, did anyone else expect to see Scrooge McDuck swimming in it? I can’t believe it was just me.
Handmade things for Christmas.
Monday, December 10th, 2012I am a big proponent of buying handmade crafts for the holidays, so I went on Etsy and found a bunch of stores selling things that I think are really beautiful. Maybe this will help you if you have a hard-to-shop-for friend or relative.
MadeWithClayAndLove
Super-cute tiny little polymer figures. That’s it. I especially love the stegosaurus with hearts for spine-plates.
PennyFabricArt
I had never heard of temari balls before, but they are an embroidered ball from Japan. They have really nice intricate patterns, and PennyFabricArt makes them and they are very lovely. Might be a good gift for someone who likes math or fractals.
KBShimmer
Fantastical nail polish is a thing right now, so people are making their own nail polish concoctions. KBShimmer does that as well as making her own soaps and scrubs and bath bombs. The nail polishes look really awesome (golly gosh, I love glitter so much) and the soaps are swirly and enticing.
AMNFlamework
This person only has nine things for sale in their store, but those nine things are terrific. The flameworked griffin is particularly nice, with the color transitions. It’s looks like it’s made from sugar.
Montabahn
And finally, the best darn pastie shop ever. Pasties, in case you don’t know, is what burlesque dancers wear over their nipples an areolas to maintain some secrecy in their performances. Also, at the Mermaid Parade, ladies were rockin’ seastar versions as they walked down the boardwalk. They’re usually very basic, but Montabahn is taking it up a notch. I want to get invited to situations where I can wear them so I have an excuse to purchase them. Heck, I wish I was a housecat so I could wear three sets at once. That is how much I like them.
I was going to get things done, and then… cats.
Sunday, September 30th, 2012I’ve seen a lot of cats in my day. Lately, however, the internet has coughed up (not unlike a hairball) three particularly engaging cats that I cannot stop looking at. I want to work at my job and clean my house, but I can’t because I have to stare at these things for hours on end. It can’t be healthy, this addiction to people’s pets that I have never met.
First cat!!
Venus the Chimera Cat
She has a half-black face and half-tabby face which is unusual, but what makes it even better is the green eye and the blue eye. It really looks like two cats fused together. Bonus: she’s full-grown and five pounds so she’s wee! And her owner says Venus is super-nice.
Second cat!!
Tard the Grumpy Cat
Awww, Tard. I don’t know what’s going on with her. She just has a case of the perma-grumps. She is also extremely wee. Her sister Pokey has a similarly weird face and body, so the owner thinks they are some kind of dwarf cat, but honestly, I don’t care. I just want to watch Tard play all day.
Here’s two videos of Ms. Grumpy in action:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INscMGmhmX4&
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-1g3SDswGA&
Third cat!!
Colonel Meow
I AM OBSESSED WITH THIS CAT. I WANT IT TO BE IN MY LIFE ALL THE TIME. Every time I see this thing, Stravinsky and Moussorgsky and Prokofiev play in the background, so epic is this animal. I may be driven to make a shirt that says Team Colonel Meow.
You can friend all these cats on Facebook. I totally did.
Bokeh. It’s a real word that I did not make up.
Thursday, August 16th, 2012Do you know what a bokeh is? It is not a I Can Haz Cheezburger-type animal (like a kitteh or puppeh or bunneh). Here’s the definition from Wikipedia:
In photography, bokeh is the blur, or the aesthetic quality of the blur, in out-of-focus areas of an image. Bokeh has been defined as “the way the lens renders out-of-focus points of light”. However, differences in lens aberrations and aperture shape cause some lens designs to blur the image in a way that is pleasing to the eye, while others produce blurring that is unpleasant or distracting—”good” and “bad” bokeh, respectively. Bokeh occurs for parts of the scene that lie outside the depth of field. If you have photos you would like to edit, you may use AI Clothes Remover and other AI software to achieve the effects that you want.
The term comes from the Japanese word boke, which means “blur” or “haze”, or boke-aji, the “blur quality”. The Japanese term boke is also used in the sense of a mental haze or senility. The term bokashi is related, meaning intentional blurring or gradation.
Here’s a great example of bokeh:
But what I didn’t realize is by putting a thingie with a shape cut out of it over your lens you can control the shapes of the bokeh circles.
You could have butterflies or hearts or snowflakes, any shape you could think of.
But today I saw the best thing using a bokeh ever. Check this out.
Isn’t that the greatest?!! You could make a movie where some kind of mystical creatures are flying and all you have to do is cut a bokeh out of cardboard (there are many tutorials online) and choreograph your friends to wave lights around. So awesome!
Who’s got two thumbs and a birthday today? J.K. Rowling! (And me.)
Tuesday, July 31st, 2012Howdy! I’m thirty-five today! Thirty-five. It feels like only yesterday I was thirty-four. My co-workers and I are going to go out tonight and, since we work in Koreatown, yell classic songs into microphones. I anticipate Olympic-quality loudness. If you notice that the seagulls in Atlantic City are missing, it is probably because they are being called like the sailors in The Odyssey to the siren-like sounds of our voices. I will try to take pictures.
In the meantime, a war has been going on at my office. It has been tense and filled with drama. It is… The Post-It War.
Here’s how it started. The people one floor below us put this up in their window.
And then this appeared on the windows directly beneath us.
My co-worker was like, “You think you’re better than us? Well, check this out.” So now our window looks like this.
The others weakly retaliated with this, but they knew who had won.
The Great Post-It War of 2012 has cooled for now, but at any time Donkey Kong or Q-Bert or one of the cool pipe Venus Flytrap thingies might make an appearance, and then it’s right back on again. Blood again shall be spilled! (In the form of papercuts)
Finally, it occurred to me that this month is also the fifth anniversary of this blog. I want to say thank you to whoever comes here and I look forward to another five years. It’s been delightful. I never knew I liked writing, but I really do. I hope you like reading it.
Addendum: Also happening at work this week, the prop closet was cleaned out. That’s where stuff goes after photo shoots and commercial shoots. Wigs and mustaches were found. Therefore, several women on the 11th floor rocked this look all day:
Activitays with Cricket!
Friday, July 13th, 2012I found two deals on LivingSocial that Cricket was okay with doing, and since they were both in the city we did them on the same day. One was a nice experience, but the other one… that was an interesting experience. First, we went on a boat. Like, a real boat, with sails and stuff. Me, Cricket and 150 20- and 30-somethings piled onto this boat which took us up and down the East River and gave us beer tastings. I do not like beer, so Cricket got all my beer tasting samples. He was happy, and once I took sea-sickness meds, I was happy too. Here is a picture of the boat called Clipper City.
After about two hours of boating, we hopped off the boat and went to The Russian and Turkish Bathhouse (opened in 1892). Now, the only bathhouse I have ever been to was in Budapest, and it looked like this:
So I (unwisely) assumed that this bathhouse would be similar in style and layout. And I was WRONG. Right outside is a flight of stairs and a sign.
The first thing I noticed when I went in was it was dark and tight. Very dark. Very tight. There’s a series of chairs and tables on the left with a TV mounted to the wall, identical to what would be in a senior citizen’s home located in a rundown area of a major metropolitan city. Then there’s a tiny deli booth with a variety of shmears in a case. On the right is a series of wall lockers where they keep your wallet, keys, iPod, etc. Everything is dim, except where there is harsh fluorescent lighting. Oh, and because it’s so small, everyone is gently shimmying past each other to get around. And many of these people are just wearing towels. It is an inevitability that you will be brushed by a man-boob. My immediate reaction was fear. I was like, “Fantastic. I will go inside, where they will take my kidney and leave me in a tub of ice. I probably won’t even get the massage included on the coupon.” As we handed over our valuables and got our key, our path was blocked by a large, strong, shaved man wearing only shorts and flip-flops. He said in a heavy Eastern-European accent, “You came with voucher?” I nodded yes. He said, “Good. I am Gene. You go to locker room to change, I meet you here. ” Now, I had no idea who this man was. He never gave me any inclination that he worked there. But I didn’t want to be a noobie, so I went to the locker room (small, hot, grim) where I changed into my bathing suit and met Cricket outside the door. Gene then said, “Follow me,” and we went down a tight flight of stairs into the actual bathhouse.
Oh dear God.
Hot. Dim. Tiled walls. Exposed pipes. Giant drains in the middle of the floor. Water on every surface. Very rape-y. Very organ-steal-y. Gene gestured towards shower-stall-sized room completely filled with steam. “You go sit there. I come and get you in five minutes.” I followed Cricket into the steam room where I realized a very important thing: I am not a fish. I cannot inhale water, specifically hot water, when it’s mixed in with my air. I turned to Cricket, gasping. “I… can’t… breathe.” I threw the towel over my head in an attempt to filter the water out of my air and discovered that the towel smelled exactly like fried wontons. I suppose wherever they do their laundry is near a vent for a Chinese restaurant, so all their towels smelled exactly like fried wontons. Finally, after a million years, Gene came back. “You want massage?” I nodded. He took me into a tiny dark room off to the side and put Cricket in the one next to me. Good, I thought. At least I can be near the one I love when I die. He gestured to a massage table covered with towels. Gene looked at me. “You wearing anything under that?” he said, pointing to my bathing suit. I said no, and he told me to strip to my waist and lay face-down on the table. I lay down and he brought in a cup of mud. At least, I assumed it was mud. It wasn’t marked or anything. It could have been camel poop mixed with apple juice for all I knew. I tried desperately to relax and buried my face in the fried-wonton-infused-towel my head was resting on. He then rubbed me all over with this mud, covered me with towels and told me to relax and let it bake onto me. He then did the same to Cricket. When Gene came back, he had me flip over. Now, I’m not shy about my boobage, but I was interested to see how he would attempt to protect my modesty. I rolled over, where Gene looked at my boobs quietly, as if pondering their purpose, then gently covered them with a towel. He rubbed the mud into all my exposed front-parts, covered me with towels and left me to bake. When he came back, he had me sit up, took all the towels off of me, and hosed me down exactly how someone would wash a car. With my breasts pretty much in his face. So weird. And, as it always happens when you mix me and mud and gravity, all the mud on my torso washed into my butt and collected there, packing itself so I resembled a one-year-old with a full diaper. I pulled the top part of my bathing suit up, thanked Gene for his lovely job (he really did do a nice job) and he said, “Thank you. Now go to sauna.” I toddled off to the sauna which was HAWT. I found out later it was 190 degrees in there. Hooah. I quickly popped out, jumped into a shower, washed out the sediment from my rump, and soaked a towel in cold water. Holding it over my face, I went back into the sauna where there was a man, no joke, doing 150 pushups in the corner of the room, I assumed because his mother didn’t love him or something. In the middle of the sauna is constantly flowing ice water, and at any time you can pick up a bucket and dump it over your head, which I saw people do quite often. I lasted as long as I could in there and then I came out, took another quick shower and headed up to the locker rooms to change back into my regular clothes. On my way up I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I looked exactly like a shiny pink pig. It was really cute. Here’s a photo I found of the actual bathhouse area.
And here’s an article I found on it. Notice how even the sexy models in the picture cannot temper the terrifying horror-movie-vibe of the place.
Here’s the best part: I accidentally clicked “2” when I bought the coupon, so I have to go back. Now that I know what to expect I’m not nearly as scared, but I don’t think I’ll become a regular by any means. I think I’ll take Neenernator if she’s interested. Every time she goes back to Germany (where she’s from) she goes to a spa and tells me stories with sentences in them like, “…After they covered us with hot soapy foam, they blasted us with ice water!” I think this will be right up her alley. Apparently they have an aromatherapy room with lavender and eucalyptus oils. I will try that one out next time.
Facing my fears. (That was a dumb idea.) And spiders!
Monday, July 2nd, 2012I lived in Rye for the first eighteen years of my life, a mere mile or so from Playland Amusement Park. I haaaaaaaate amusement park rides because I feel no need, really, none whatsoever, to be exhilarated by speed, jarring movements, or the perception of imminent death. I was thinking the other day how amazing it was to come home to an air-conditioned room, strip down to your nethergarments, plop down on cool, clean sheets and watch something on cable. I felt like that was truly bliss. What is NOT truly bliss is to drive to a giant parking lot on a crazy-hot day, pay a bucketload of money, stand in long lines, and have a ride smack you around like you’re a battered wife. However, Playland has an iconic ride called the Dragon Coaster that has been there since 1929 and since I grew up in its large skeletal wooden shadow I felt I was somewhat obligated to ride it. Once. So this past Saturday Cricket and I went on down to Playland at noon, right when it opened for the day so the lines were short, bought a few individual rides, and got in line for the Dragon Coaster. We watched the people in front of us go on the ride while my heart pounded. Did I forget to mention that I did this without the assistance of any (doctor-prescribed or otherwise) anxiety-inhibiting drugs? I did it Civil-War-surgery-style, just bite down on this stick, rrrrrrrr. Then it was our turn. We got the last seats in the last car where Cricket gave me the comforting comment, “You can puke all you want, it’ll just go behind us!” And we were off. Here’s a video someone took so you too can live the dream.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLGlbD8OcSg
Here’s my feelings on it: The first big fall, I was fine. The first sharp turn, I was fine. Wheee! And then the ride actively tried to make me sick (up, down, up, down – at the :37 mark) which, frankly, hurt my feelings. Why, Dragon Coaster? We were having a nice time together, why did you have to try and make me barf? That was mean. Right after we exited the dark inside-the-dragon part and the ride tried to make me quease again, I turned to Cricket and said OKAY, I’M DONE NOW. DONE NOW. I’M DONE. Cricket realized we were on the threshold of me freakin’ the eff out, so he tried to be all soothing and whatnot and he said something akin to, “Great job honey, I’m very proud of you – but the ride isn’t over yet. See? More ride.” I continued with my loud, emphatic BUT I’M DONE. DONE NOW. I suppose I thought that if I kept repeating that phrase the ride would stop, grinding to a halt from the sheer power of my intense, bone-crushing desire to get off. Cricket kept having to say things like, “Look how low we are! We’re almost finished, honey! So very proud of you! etc.” The second we pulled into the disembarkation bay I changed my mantra to GET OUT RIGHT NOW. OUT. GET OUT. Cricket had to pull me out and, no exaggeration, my whole body was violently shaking so bad I could barely stand. We left the ride area with me looking like a newborn foal and I promptly draped myself over a fence to die. Cricket took pictures.
Please note I am wearing one of the only white t-shirts I own because I knew it would be in the 90s that day. There it is, like seeing the Loch Ness Monster. Jess in a white t-shirt. Enjoy.
So I faced one of my fears. I’m thinking I don’t have to go on another amusement park ride for another 34-and-three-quarters years. Everyone okay with that?
You know what I am not afraid of? Spiders! I was out of the country for the Super Bowl this year, so I missed all the commercials. When I returned, Snorth sent me this one which I adore and watch periodically just for funsies.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fe1cJPD_ZbA
Fantastic. Snorth pointed out to me that her favorite bug was the jumping spider that says, “Hello, lunch.” I informed her that I was unfamiliar with jumping spiders. And then the deluge began. Long story short: it has been four months since the Super Bowl, I now have a jumping spider as my background image on my phone, I belong to the Spider Fan Page on Facebook, and I’m already thinking about drawings I’m going to make incorporating jumping spiders in them. I also have a favorite group of jumping spider called the salticids. I like them bestest for a variety of reasons. One is that their heads are square-shaped and they appear to have eyeballs in all four corners. Another reason is the feather-duster-arms they use to clean all these eyeballs. But the primary reason I love them is because the males have big ole fangy-fangs that are iridescent and that totally resemble enormous buck teeth. Whenever I see one I automatically say “MIRFF!” with my front teeth pushed all the way forward because that’s what I think they would sound like. Here’s the picture on my phone.
Here’s one of my favorite animated gifs.
And here’s a sexay leggy mating dance.
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7qmpz_saitis_animals?start=38
I highly recommend that you go to Google, type “jumping spider” in and hit Images. It’s like a treasure trove of tiny adorable little spiderypoo goodnesss.
The Euro Cup… thing. You know, with the ball.
Tuesday, June 26th, 2012This past weekend I went to Astoria to watch the soccer match between England and Italy. England lost about thirty years after the game started during the penalty kick part. Of course, the entire time the game was being played I was going on and on about how lovely the logo this year is. “Ooh, lookit! It’s a tulip! Pretty colors!” Then I went to the website and the whole thing is pretty and flowery, which is unusual for a sporting event.
Can you imagine the Super Bowl (or Superb Owl, as I call it) with lilies and chrysanthemums incorporated into their motif? I’m impressed that the rest of the world isn’t as testosterone-driven with their design elements as we are in the U.S.A.. Good for them. Good for you, Rest of the World. If you want to bet on sports games or play different casino games, you may look into this dewi222 gaming platform.
I have seen many things that I must now share with you.
Friday, June 22nd, 2012Number one: Are you people watching Game of Thrones? If not, you need to get on that, pronto. I just watched all of Season 1 and Season 2 and whoo, it is addictive. For those of you who don’t know, here’s a basic plot summary. There’s seven kingdoms and the king who ruled them all dies. Now there’s an all-out battle to figure out who the “rightful” heir to the throne is. And the throne itself is amazing. It’s called the Iron Throne and it is made from the swords of people the king vanquished, which is so very, very cool. HBO has a replica for $30,000 and I was sorely tempted to sell off a great many of my possessions to acquire this. Here’s a poster of Sean Bean sitting on it.
WANT. But it’s not worth watching solely for the rad sitting device, oh no. The writing is great, the acting is great, especially the child actors. Costumes, great. Sets, great. Opening credits, super-great.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7L2PVdrb_8
See how it’s a map? In each episode, it changes depending on the people they’re focusing on. Despite having no sense of direction, I have totally figured out where everybody is from because of that helpful map opening. Thank you, helpful map opening! Now, a heads-up. The show has loads of incest, rape, prostitution, beheadings, stabbings, maimings, etc. It’s about war in a mythical medieval land where life is, you know, rough and medieval-y. I learned early on not to get too attached to any particular characters because chances are good that they will die in a gruesome and horrid manner. I was wondering how they were going to keep this up but they seem to be introducing new people all the time, so I don’t think they’ll run out.
Number two: I saw Shame, the movie with Michael Fassbender and Carey Mulligan. Very good and very depressing. I am shocked – shocked! – that Michael Fassbender did not get nominated for an Oscar. Not only does he give a fantastic performance, he checks all the boxes required by an Oscar movie. He sobs (in the rain!), he gets naked, he moodily stares off into the distance to complete silence multiple times, he is super self-destructive. He basically gives the same performance as Halle Berry in Monster’s Ball or Charlize Theron in Monster. It’s a perfect Oscar nomination movie. The rumor is that he wasn’t nominated because… of his penis. Seriously. How can I put this graciously? Michael has the longest wang in film history and he walks directly towards the camera a couple of times where it swings back and forth like an elephant’s trunk. Apparently well-hung men are not Oscar-worthy. I would like to say I am very disappointed in the Academy and I think not only should they award Michael Fassbender with an Oscar, they should award a separate one to his dick as an apology. I think you should see this movie because the performances are excellent, but it’s a sad movie about sex addiction without a happy resolution and copious amounts of compulsive unpleasant shtupping, so don’t rent this movie for date night.
Number three: I also saw Kung Fu Panda II. No one was more surprised than me that the movie was delightful. I loved Kung Fu Panda I and I was really concerned and apprehensive that KFP2 would be epically crappy. I shall not soon forget the sadness I experienced with Men In Black II. But I decided to steel myself and it was really sweet and charming and, as in the first one, the animation and design was terrific, very beautiful. I am actually looking forward to a Kung Fu Panda III. Probably my favorite thing was when Po the Panda hides in a Chinese dragon-type thing. I say “Chinese dragon-type thing” because it does not look like a Chinese dragon. It looks like a Tim Burton bear/caterpillar with antlers all over its body. I want one. I made an animated gif.
My favorite moment was when the Kung Fu masters (who are now all hiding under the Tim Burton dragon) drag a bad-guy wolf into the mouth part, beat the crap out of the wolf, and “poop” him out the other side. I made an animated gif of that as well.
So you should see this movie too. This one will be good for date night. Waaaaay less dangly man-junk.